What to Expect from Your Family Lawyer & What They Expect from You
By Daniella Marchand, Family Lawyer, Calgary
When you're going through a family law matter, one of the most important relationships you'll have is with your lawyer. Clear and open communication can make all the difference in how your case unfolds. But it’s also important to understand that this is a two-way relationship—one where both you and your lawyer have distinct roles to play.
In this blog, we’ll explore what those roles look like. While your lawyer provides legal advice, explains your options, and helps you understand how the law applies to your situation, it’s ultimately up to you—the client—to decide which path to take. When you understand these roles, you’ll be better equipped to make informed choices and ensure the legal process goes as smoothly as possible.
Understanding the Lawyer’s Role
In any family law matter, whether it's divorce, parenting disputes, or division of property, your lawyer is there to provide legal expertise and counsel. Their role is to help you understand how the law applies to your situation and what the legal process involves. They will also explain your options, assess the strengths and weaknesses of your case, and guide you through the various resolution paths available.
Family law can be complicated, involving both provincial and federal legislation. Lawyers are trained to interpret and apply these laws in a way that supports your goals. For example, if you are seeking custody of your children, your lawyer will inform you about the legal standards in Alberta regarding the "best interests of the child," and help you understand what you need to prove in court. Similarly, if there’s a dispute over property division in a divorce, your lawyer will guide you through the principles of equitable division under the Family Property Act.
Your lawyer will also advise you on potential outcomes and strategies. They can explain whether it may be more beneficial to settle out of court through negotiation or mediation, or whether pursuing litigation is necessary. In short, your lawyer provides a professional perspective on your situation and how the law is likely to affect your case.
However, it’s important to remember that your lawyer’s advice is just that—advice. Their role isn’t to make decisions for you, but to give you the information you need to make an informed choice about how to move forward.
The Client’s Responsibility
While your lawyer offers guidance, the ultimate responsibility for making decisions rests with you, the client. Your lawyer cannot take steps without your instructions. Your personal interests, values, and goals play a significant role in shaping the course of your case.
For instance, if your lawyer recommends pursuing a settlement agreement in your divorce, they’ll outline the pros and cons of that option. But it’s your decision whether to accept the terms of the settlement or push for different terms in court. Similarly, if there’s an opportunity to mediate a dispute over child custody, your lawyer can explain how mediation compares to litigation, but the decision to proceed with mediation is ultimately yours.
It’s also important to remember that family law often involves deeply personal and emotional issues. While your lawyer is trained to focus on the legal strategy, they also understand the emotional weight these matters carry. They can offer guidance on how to approach sensitive topics in a way that prioritizes the well-being of everyone involved.
It’s important to trust your lawyer’s expertise, but also to feel empowered to make decisions based on your values and the advice you receive. When your lawyer outlines different options, it’s up to you to consider them carefully and choose the path that feels right for you and your situation.
How to Effectively Instruct Your Lawyer
Effective communication with your family lawyer is key to ensuring your case moves forward in a way that reflects your goals. It’s important to be open and honest, giving your lawyer all the information they need to provide sound advice. This includes sharing relevant details about your case, along with any personal concerns, goals, or fears you may have about the process.
Clear communication isn’t just about what you share, it’s also about how you express your needs. When giving instructions to your lawyer, it helps to be specific and direct about what you want to achieve. If you’re unsure about any part of your case, don’t hesitate to ask questions to clarify the legal process and understand the potential outcomes of each option. Your lawyer can’t read your mind, so it’s important to express your expectations and goals clearly.
Along with giving instructions, it’s also important to remain open to feedback. Your lawyer may suggest something different from what you originally had in mind, but that doesn’t mean it’s not in your best interest. For example, if you’re set on going to court but your lawyer believes mediation could achieve the same result more efficiently, take their advice into careful consideration. Remember, your lawyer’s guidance comes from years of experience and a deep understanding of the law.
Lastly, keep your lawyer informed of any developments on your side. If your circumstances change—like a change to your financial situation or a new realization about what you want—let your lawyer know so they can adjust their strategy accordingly.
What to Do When Legal Advice Doesn’t Match Your Personal Goals
At times, your lawyer’s advice might not align with what you personally want. When that happens, it’s important to have an open and honest conversation with them. Ask questions to better understand the reasoning behind their advice. This doesn’t mean you have to follow their advice, but it can provide you with the tools and information you need to make an informed decision.
For example, your lawyer might recommend accepting a property settlement offer in your divorce, explaining the potential risks of rejecting it—such as time delays, added costs, or the unpredictability of a judge’s ruling. But you may feel strongly that the proposal doesn’t fairly reflect your contributions to the relationship or your financial future. It’s important to remember that, as the client, you have the power to decide whether to accept the terms or negotiate for a better outcome. At the same time, it’s essential to consider your lawyer’s advice when making that decision.
If you still feel that your goals don’t align with the legal advice you’ve been given, you have every right to seek a second opinion from another lawyer. Some clients feel more comfortable with a different approach, and there’s no harm in getting another perspective. Just make sure your decisions are based on a full understanding of the legal implications involved.
In the end, when legal advice doesn’t fully align with what you want, it’s about finding a balance. Ultimately, your lawyer will provide you with advice that reflects your legal rights and options, but how you balance that advice with your personal objectives is something only you can decide.
When you hire a lawyer to represent you in a family law case, it’s important to understand the distinct roles that both you and your lawyer play in resolving your matter. Your lawyer is there to offer advice and guidance but ultimately, you make the decisions based on that advice. Clear communication, balancing legal strategy with personal goals, and staying open to feedback are all essential to building a strong lawyer-client relationship. When you understand and respect these roles, you can work together to navigate your case with greater confidence and clarity.
At Crossroads Law, we know how important it is to feel heard, supported, and included in the decision-making process. If you’re ready to take the next step, we encourage you to book a free 20-minute consultation to talk about what matters most to you—and how we can help you move forward.
